I was scrolling Facebook this morning when I came upon a post that stopped me in my tracks. 

This coach and I are fairly new acquaintances. We're in a group together, and we just became "Facebook friends" a few months ago. 

Her post was a long rant against cold-pitch direct messages.

You know - the "I've never met you... BUY MY STUFF!!!!!" kind of message.🤮🤮🤮

She went on for paragraphs about how gross it is. And she's right. Everything she said in her post was spot on.

So why did it bother me?

Then it hit me. And I checked my Messenger app.

Every DM she's ever sent me - 3 or 4 since we've been connected - was a "I've never met you... BUY MY STUFF!!!!!" kind of message.

Seriously?!?!

I'm not sure she even realizes there's such a disconnect between her messaging and her practices.

Over my years as a coach, I've seen many things that tank people's confidence. Many things they had no control over - like an abusive past or an unsupportive parent/spouse.

But of the things you DO have control over, one mistake stands out more than others: being out of alignment with your core values.

You've gotta practice what you preach.

Because character matters. It's one of the 3 Pillars of Self-Worth.

And when you're not living with integrity, you know it. You feel it. And it usually shows up as a lack of self-worth. (Or arrogance, which is really a lack of self-worth masquerading as confidence.)

It can also show up as feeling out of balance. A feeling of overwhelm, or that something's "off." Or "life just isn't working."

Have you ever felt that?

For most of us, the disconnect isn't as overt as with this coach. It's usually MUCH more subtle. You may not even be consciously aware of it.

Perhaps you've been living more by default than intention.

Perhaps you have a hard time saying no to requests for your time, even when you know it's not the best thing for you.

Perhaps you're trying to follow a business model (or parenting advice, or a homeschool approach, etc), and you're trying to make it work even though it doesn't quite sit right in your heart.

These are all examples of living out of alignment.

The out-of-balance feeling is real. The stress and the overwhelm are real.

I'm working on a new course about life balance, which dives deep into discovering your core values, living with integrity and alignment, and reducing the overwhelm, resentment, and exhaustion, so you can make time for what matters - even if you don't know where to start, or "no" seems like a dirty word.

You'll hear more about it in the coming weeks. But if this is something you say, "I NEED this, now!" just reply to this email and I'll send you details early.

In the meantime...